What's in a (nick)name

So sweet Sarah just read my post on nicknames and told me a few things I didn’t know, which led to an enlightening google search. But geez, there are so many facets to this subject, I'm not sure I'll be able to condense my findings into a blog post that won't bore you to tears. But here's my attempt in a large nutshell: All Thais are given nicknames at birth because their real names are so humorously long and hard to pronounce, even for fellow Thais—and also to confuse ghosts (but more on that in a bit). Some nicknames are one syllable of the full name, but the great majority are just words for things such as animals or fruit. I've personally taught a Poo (crab), Tai (rabbit), Jeab (baby chicken), Pla (fish), Muu (pig), Maow (Cat), Som (orange), Kluay (banana) and Ple (Apple). (Of course, Gwenyth Paltrow wouldn't find the last one at all unusual.) I've also taught students named after their size or birth order: Lek (small), Noi (little), Yai (big), Pui (fat), Nueng (one), Song (two). Some of these names may seem offensive, but there's a completely logical reason behind them. From what I gather, there's a cohort of evil spirits conspiring to swipe newborns. But their rolodexes are organized by birth names, so nicknames thwart their baby-snatching schemes. Some families, though, opt for extra defense against the slyer spooks in the form of an uncomplimentary nickname. You see, this is a superficial supernatural bunch, especially keen on cute babies; they will snootily pass over those called pig, for instance, who must be unattractive. This is, I read, also the reason Thais tend to say babies are ugly.

Later in life, nicknames are associated with luck. Thais experiencing a string of bad luck may change their nickname just like that. And without so much as flinching, friends and family will start calling them by the new name.

It is now uber trendy, and controversial, for Thai parents to give their children English nicknames. I mentioned some of these in a previous post, but here are more of my students to add to the list: Bank and Mink (referring to wealth), Joke and X. A recent article in the New York Times covered the movement to quell this trend in an effort to preserve Thai culture.

Hello? You still there? Oh, my loyal friends. I have more! (I know, I know. You have things to do! But isn't this fascinating?) Turns out last names are just as quirky. Surnames, which only became legally required here in 1920 (!), must be unique to a family. So there's like a jillion last names and rarely will two people have the same first and last name. To make things even more interesting, it is common for families here to change their surnames (I'm not sure why—maybe again with the luck thing—and frankly, I'm tired of researching). But can you imagine that family meeting? "Okay, our family name currently means those who will be rewarded for good deeds. Let's change it to those who cook the best tom yum for many friends. "